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I miss my sister, n mum, n dad, n my brothers..... really love tthem alot!!! i cunt imagine, what i will do wen God asks me to forsake tem for HIM.. i will be stuck!!! anyways, like ruth always tells me, "if u go through that, God will give u the strength" I hop he does!!!
God has always been very good to me n i always have this mentality that i need to do something to reciprocate his love!! But i m reminded now and again that I HAVE TO DO NOTHING!!!! All i have to do is live in his love n be obedient,, (which at time, i tel u, its hard,, obedience requires great skill alryt,, lol)
Ok ok. ten these past few week. The sunday preachers r like talking non-stop about obedience n stuffs. gettin to my head.......... how fulfilling God's mission will require for a sacrifice on personal happiness and safety! n then during worship songs like blessed be your name,,,, they tend to tell me stuffs i never knew before.... "Blessed be your name....... THOUGH THERE'S PAIN IN THE OFFERING, blessed be your name"
I think God is telling me something... like i need to give up something i love (my dreams or something, duno!! n its scary)
Ok the to make matters worst,,, while havin dinner with Ayan, he was telling me how people dont become successful instantly. He told me, "go ask any successful business man, the top CEO's, anyone... they will tel u what they went through. they did not start there uno, some of them started as door to door salesman or something like that" (Guess he was talkin about his brother.. lol. ayan if u r reading this..... HI n sorry for comments)then i was like thinking.... "but there r people who get it wiout tryin"
MMMm........... anyways...... God has a better plan for me then i have for myself.......
Oh man!! yeserday i was carrying mark's baby....... ten this sudded feelin came up to me... like i wana baby... oh man,, mark's baby is soooooooooo cute....... it just rouse up the passion i have for having a baby!!! way to go sister............ ok i l stop now..... guess m borin u guys.......... LOL ciao!!!
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4 comments:
Hi Avoni,
It's Divya (Rach's friend). I can totally relate to your situation(with a slight difference, mine's more food related).
i often feel like... there's something i'm meant to be doing, like i have so much more i can do, but im just stuck. i cant seem to go forward and i dont even know what to do to get moving forward.
baby steps eh? hopefully we'll get there, slowly but surely!
thanks Divya....... u r such and encouragement........ hope to c u face to face one day.....
me to! i told rachel that i would love to learn to play the piano and she said u play wonderfully. so i must try and persuade u to teach me and i can pay u with food lol, we'll have a barter trade going!
sure i'd love to...... ur cakes n the dishes r like so amazing... i bet i wud go gaga wen i taste it... LOl...... cya!!!
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